candy521

1.Canadian Citizenship Application  
天才翻译官  
An immigrant from China is applying for citizenship in Canada. He is to be interviewed by a Canadian immigration officer. He does not speak English well and knows nothing about Canada. Therefore, he invited a special translator to help him in his interview.
一个来自中国的移民,要申请加拿大公民;他不大会说英语,,也不了解加拿大.为了面对移民官的面试,他请了专门的翻译官来帮忙;
Officer:  Do you know who was the first Prime Minister of Canada?
官员提问;『请问加拿大的总理是谁?』
Translator: ( in Cantonese) The officer asked you,
翻译官用广东话说;「移民官问你;
Where do you usually go if you want to eat hamburger?
『 如果你想吃汉堡,通常你会去哪里??』」
Man: (answered to the officer) Oh..... McDonald (the first minister of Canada is Sir John MacDonald.)
申请人对着移民官回答说; 『噢 ! 麦当劳!! 』(加拿大的总理,叫做Sir John MacDonald.)

The officer nodded his head and then asked the second question.
移民官点头,然后问下一个问题;
Officer: Could you tell me which province you're living in now?
移民官问;「你可以告诉我,你现在住哪一省吗??」

Translator: (in Cantonese) The officer just asked
you, What is the dirtiest thing in your nose?
翻译人用广东话说;「移民官问你;『甚么,是你鼻子里最脏的东西?』」

Man: (replied to the officer in Cantonese) Ah..... Bay See (which means nose dirt in Chinese) (The man lives in the province of British Columbia, commonly known as B.C.)
申请人用广东话回答移民官说; 『 啊鼻屎!! 』(即中文鼻子里的脏东西)
(他住在the province of British Columbia,简称为B.C. 广东话鼻屎同音)

The officer nodded his head again and asked the final question.
移民官又点头,而后问最后问题.
Officer: Do you know what your privilege is when you become Canadian?
移民官问; 「你成为加拿大公民后,享有甚么权利??」
Translator: (in Cantonese) The officer asked you, How
does a dog sounds like when it barks?
翻译人用广东话说;「移民官问你;『狗吠的时候,叫声是怎样??』」

Man: (demonstrated the sound to the officer)... Woe, Woe. (Vote, Vote. One of the privileges of a Canadian is the right to vote.)
申请人当着移民官的面,做出狗吠的声音;『Woe, Woe!!』(Vote, Vote.)
成为加拿大公民的特权之一,就是投票(Vote.)
The officer told the man that all the questions were answered correctly, shook hands with him and congratulated him that he had passed the interview to be a Canadian citizen.
移民官告诉申请人说;所有的问题都答对,跟他握手,并且向他恭喜,已经通过成为加拿大公民的面试了!
2.帅哥
帅哥对老爸说：
“「我喜欢靓妹..请你答应让我们结婚吧!!」”
老爸面带愁容：“「我老实告诉你...孩子..她是你老爸年轻时..一时糊涂所种下的孽缘..她是你妹妹..你不能和她结婚啊..」”
帅哥得知後..终日闷闷不乐...
老妈看到了...非常不忍心..於是也对帅哥说了真相：“「其实....你也不是你爸亲生的」”
3.根
话说：曹丕迫曹植七步成诗
植：煮豆.........，本是同根生，相煎何太急。
太屎公曰：这个“根”字写得好!

zj19820

1、翻译官很有小聪明，不过移民官没这么好忽悠吧
2、一错再错的意思就是双重否定可以表示肯定!
3、同“根”生！曹操的根

宝贝抱抱

1：这个翻译也太有才了，一般人还真没这水平。
2：应了那句古语:淫人妻女者，妻女必被人淫。
3：这个“根”也太有说服力了。